Why Does My Kid Hate Math Homework? (And What to Do About It)

Math Homework Meltdowns Are Common

Every night, millions of families go through this:

• "I don't get it!"
• "This is stupid!"
• Tears. Yelling. Slamming books.
• Everyone exhausted and frustrated.

If this is your house, you're not alone.

Why Math Homework Feels Worse Than Other Subjects

It exposes gaps immediately: You either can solve the problem or you can't. There's no hiding.

It's cumulative: Unlike history (where you can learn the Civil War without knowing ancient Rome), math builds. One gap creates more gaps.

It feels like a test every night: Every problem has a right/wrong answer. The pressure is constant.

Parents often can't help: "That's not how I learned it" makes kids feel more stuck.

It takes longer when you're struggling: What should take 15 minutes takes an hour.

Common Causes of Math Homework Hate

1. They genuinely don't understand

• Gaps in foundational skills
• Missed instruction (sick day, wasn't paying attention)
• The concept wasn't taught in a way that clicked

2. They're embarrassed

• They feel dumb
• They don't want you to see them struggle
• Siblings seem to find it easy

3. They're exhausted

• Math homework after a full school day is hard
• Cognitive fatigue is real
• Hungry or tired = worse math performance

4. They've developed math anxiety

• Past failures created fear
• Pressure made it worse
• Now they freeze before they start

5. It feels pointless

• "When will I ever use this?"
• No connection to anything they care about

Strategies That Actually Help

Lower the emotional temperature

• Stay calm (even when they're not)
• "This is hard. Let's figure it out together."
• Take breaks when frustration peaks
• Separate the child from the struggle

Find a better time

• Right after school when they're fried might be the worst time
• Try after a snack, some play, or a mental reset
• Some kids do better doing it in the morning before school

Break it into chunks

• "Let's just do three problems, then take a break"
• Small wins build momentum
• Finishing feels possible

Ask questions instead of explaining

• "What do you already know about this?"
• "What part is confusing?"
• "What would you try first?"
• Let them think instead of rescuing

Let them struggle (a little)

Productive struggle builds problem-solving skills. Don't jump in at the first sign of difficulty. But don't let them drown either.

When they're really stuck:

• Look at the textbook or notes together
• Work a similar problem while they watch
• Check YouTube for that specific topic
• Let them write "I didn't understand this" and move on

Address underlying gaps

If the same issues keep appearing, stop fighting the homework and fix the foundation. Our practice tools can help them build skills outside of homework stress.

What NOT to Do

• Don't do the homework for them
• Don't threaten or bribe
• Don't compare to siblings
• Don't say "This is easy"
• Don't let it go on for hours

When Homework Takes Forever

If it consistently takes 2-3x longer than expected:

• Talk to the teacher
• They may have gaps that need addressing
• There may be a learning difference worth investigating
• The teacher needs to know what's happening at home

The Goal: Independence

Your job is to help them help themselves:

• Build skills so they can do it alone
• Reduce anxiety so they can think clearly
• Teach problem-solving strategies
• Know when to seek help (from you, teacher, or tutor)